I have never really spoken out about depression. To be honest, I didn’t know enough about it.
Whenever i felt low myself i blamed it on stress, life, everyone else. I always thought ‘Look at myself, i have a job, a house, a husband, a beautiful child, how can i be depressed? People have it far worse.’ Sound familiar?
This morning i decided to do some research. Yes googling things can lead you to believe you have an underlying illness, cancer, covid, pregnancy etc. But then i came across a motherhood forum. Reading this strangers post made me realise i could have wrote it myself. Everything she listed I’m going through. Anger issues, stress levels through the roof, feeling overwhelmed, feeling like a rubbish mum and wife. The comments she recieved though from these supportive mums were so heartwarming. Noone judged her, noone made her think that she should ‘just get over it’ which is what i keep twlling myself. Instead they all said it sounded like depression and that she should talk to a health visitor or her gp.
Some symptoms of depression can be anger, frustration, irritability, not wanting to be touched, unfocused mind, exhausted, cancelling on friends and more. All these things that can seem like nothing much can be a sign of depression. Who knew? Not me.
What’s worse is that when someone who doesn’t know this could be a sign of depression tells you to ‘just get over it’ it can cause you to go deeper into that depression, which is totally not your fault by the way, and then you start blaming yourself and the cycle continues, getting progressively worse. This includes when you tell yourself to get over it aswell.
This has been me for the last month or so and i want you to know you are not alone if this also sounds like you. I’m not here to tell you how to fix it. I honest don’t know yet but you are NOT alone. There are so many women and men going through this and what do we do, we keep it all inside untill its too much. if you are reading this i am assuming you have an incling that you do have a problem and you need some help. Some things that can help are…
1. Talk to someone who you can trust
2. Talk to a gp
3. Start a journal and write down your own feelings.
4. Start a yoga practice to focus in on yourself and your feelings.
The first step is admitting to yourself that you have a problem or at least you know there is something not quite right only then can you start to figure out how to fix it.
If you have read this and feel like you may be suffering please try the steps above and take care of yourself, be kind to yourself and realize that its not really you, depression can take over but it can be fixed.
If you have never tried yoga i would highly recommend it. I have just released my 3 days to destress series. Which you can get by signing up on leahyoga.co.uk. Or i have plenty of videos up on my youtube channel.
I hope it helps and i hope we can all find a little peace and kindness for ourselves in this world and remember you never know what someone is going through. Speak to people you trust and maybe lend an ear if you think someone else may be suffering.
Leah